"The Best Girl"

Firstly....DO NOT RAG ME ABOUT BULLFIGHTING!! I DO NOT CONDONE IT NOR LIKE IT!!!!
I am just in love with this HORSE! Ignore the whole bullfighting thing if you can and just watch this awesome freakin' horse!!!

*THUDS*

I want to thank EVERYONE for the wonderful birthday wishes and those that sent virtual gifts and cards...extra snogs!!!!!
I won't lie, I'm 42! I've worked hard for every stinking year and there's been times I've wondered seriously if I'd make another year.
Thanks to everyone on my flist! Even though I haven't been posting much, I've been quietly lurking and you've all been in my thoughts each and every day.

And I got an early birthday present when JJ got his 3rd consecutive championship. GO JIMMIE AND CHAD!! (mumbles to self, really should stop thinking of slashing those two)



And yes...I will be in Talladega next spring if it kills me! *grins*

So I disappear for awhile and come back to find my emotion icons, my Erestor mood thingies have disappeared. This just freakin figures!
Gale Harold gets hurt, Erestor disappears...just kiss my ass!!

Here's our newest addition, Snowman. He's a 7month old Germand Shepherd mix. We found him at Tractor Supply Company during their pet adoption weekend! He's just so loveable and definately is the 'muscle' to go with Spicey's quickness and experience.

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Here's some of the snow from March, including the introduction of the goats!
Our old girl, Buffy!

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Well, I'm still here...feeling all kinds of embarassed and stupid, but I'm here.
Firstly, I want to thank ALL the well wishes, I appreciate each and every one of them.
Secondly, I'll try to explain a bit what went down.
As most everyone knows, I just started a new job so I don't have health insurance yet, except for my VA. The closest VA hospital is Fayetteville or Little Rock, easily over an hour away for either one. I've always been one to just 'tough it out', whether being sick or hurt, I'll just suck it up and sooner or later I get better.

I've had my appendix flare up several times over the years and it ALWAYS went away. Not this time. During the last snowstorm it had begun to kick in again and I attempted to 'tough it out' once more. Couple days went by and the pain in my side went away mostly but I was nauseous, running a fever, and puking.

Truly, it felt like it went on FOREVER but the parents started freaking out and even I, finally, said take me to the VA. I knew it was messed up if I was ready to go to the hospital. I barely remember the drive to Fayetteville, it's all a blur of shots, the stinkin IV, strange people in surgical masks, and a very friendly nurse.

The stay in the hospital lasted damned near a week, the doctor kept shaking his head saying sheer meanness/stubborness on my part was the only thing that probably kept me alive. *grins* See, it can pay to be mean as hell sometimes!

Spent I don't know HOW long just lying in my own bed or couch before I could go outside on my own. Shoot! For the first few days at home, the old farts even hid my phone so I wouldn't 'strain' myself. Yeah, my phone's heavy as hell.

Luckily, since I have a 'desk job' and work with nurses and doctors, I was able to come back to work last Monday. Still can't lift heavy items but they watch me like a hawk anyways. I know, I only have myself to blame, but dammit!! *heavy sigh*

While I was recuping, my sister sent over some of her goats since she didn't want to overload her area. And, keeping the buck away from the does, keeps the milk much nicer. So we have Chewie, the African Pygmy buck; Molly, a La Mancha do; and the mini-mancha twin kids, no names yet. I'll post pics of them but it's killing me not being able to maul them around like I want to. Chewie is a very nice, buck. He loves being petted and having between his horns scratched. Him and the twins will yell at you when you go outside, it's pretty funny.

AND last weekend we adopted a white German Shepherd. He's 7 months old and I get to go get him today. He was being neutered and updated on his shots Monday and yesterday. I'll get piccies of him, too. We were wanting another outside dog to go with Spicy, something with a little more 'muscle' since Buffy is insisting on retirement. She flat ass refuses to stay outside once the sun goes down or if it looks like it might sprinkle. LOL!! Can't say as I blame her.

I'll sign off for now.
Once more, thank you again for all the well wishes!!

**huggles & smoochies flist**

Some of you are familiar with little Saddle, my Australian Shepherd baby who was most likely deaf and her vision was poor. She was doing great for the past few months, getting bigger, playing with her momma and Bo...but then she wasn't acting the same. She'd become anxious and she was acting like something was hurting her but I couldn't find out what.

So, I dropped her off at the vet this morning for a checkup and was told she'd be ready by lunch. I go and the vet takes me to a back room and tells me Saddle was definately deaf and ALL vision was gone. What was disturbing is they had to actually shake her to wake her up when it was time for her exam. Stomping the floor didn't work, neither did shaking the door. Most deaf dogs can sense that much movement. Not her. The most shocking find was a huge mass in her abdomen. It was killing off blood vessels to her other organs and pinching her intestines.

Long story short...surgery wasn't an option and it was only going to get worse...alot worse.

So I had to make the most gutwrenching choice we pet owners can make --- I decided to have her euthanized.

It kills me because I wonder if she felt betrayed, or were we selfish in wanting to keep her around a little longer and should've had her put down when she was just a baby. I don't know. I torture myself with this each time. But what I do know is she is she can see and hear those damned rabbits now and Heaven help them when she catches them.

Well! I've finished training for my new job. My new job is with an oncologists office in Russellville. The title is financial counselor but I just make sure insurances are verified and make sure any procedures need to be preauthorized. Then I go over the info with the patient so they'll know what to expect and if they can't pay the balance, help them get assistance. It's very fast paced and very busy and I think I'm going to love it.

The problem...having to drive to Little Rock EVERYDAY since Monday for training! GOD!!!!! Had to get up too damned early, got home too damned late! It's amazing for the size of the city how much freakin traffic there is! I can't believe the stupid state didn't make it three lanes between Conway and Little Rock. Shit! They widened the lanes and shoulders out but didn't make three lanes, I just don't freakin understand.

Anyway! Just thought I'd let ya'll know I am back in the land of the employed. Thanks to everyone for all the happy thoughts and support!!!

**hugs & squishes flist**

Two signs that hell is freezing over:

It's snowing like a bitch here! I know, I know, nothing like our friends to the north (great snow cheese wheel of Wisconsin, GRINS), but for here, it's not good. We have a snow advisory until midnight and looking at the radar, if it keeps snowing this heavy for the next two hours, *shudders* I WILL NOT venture from the house tomorrow. People are freaking stupid around here when it comes to driving. *shakes head at morons*

Two...I FINALLY received my first UI check. THANK GOD!!! Now I can put gas in the truck to KEEP looking for a job. The one I was so stoked about last week...still haven't heard anything from them. Jerks!

To nip this rant in the ass, I'll post two piccies I just took about 1/2 hour ago. Spicey and Saddle wondering WTF?!?!? Who ordered this shit?????
And yes, hasn't our little runt grown!!!

Well, the interview last Monday went very well I thought. The Business Office manager used to be the admitting supervisor at the hospital and she knows my work ethic and loved when I helped her out. They were supposed to come to a decision the beginning of this week, but Monday has come and gone and so far no word. Shit!

Anyway, I went ahead and put in two more applications; an administrative assistant and a biller/receptionist/med assistant, they said they'd train the right person, so it can't hurt to put in an app and resume there. *shrugs*

I was supposed to receive my first UI check last week, all I got was an envelope and a note stating they needed more info from me. So I call, seems my answers on my original application didn't match on on the weekly phone in for your benefits. I told the wench it's because the phone options did NOT match their application. She said she'd clear the error so I'd get that check, still haven't, but I don't know how this week's is going to go since the options still are fucked. So, still no job and still no money. AND I did my taxes, only getting a piddly 111.00 back from federal, which I'll get tomorrow but need to make last til I get a freakin job BUT have to pay back 45.00 of that to the great freakin state of Arkansas.

Hey, lazy ass crackwhore! I hope you enjoy your welfare check bitch!!!!!
Yes, I can say that, I know of one in particular who is proud to state she doesn't like to work and will sponge off the state until she's dead....here's hoping it's soon dammit!

*SCREAMS AND PULLS OUT HAIR AGAIN*

Nothing like tax season to make a single, no dependent, person feel totally fucking useless except for what we can pay in to the system, but heaven forbid when we actually need it. Hmph! Like UI benefits! FUCKERS!!!

OK, that's enough bitching for now.

Here's a couple pics of my little brother, Bo, in his favorite spot...my bed.





WTF?!?!? Who said YOU could get in MY bed?????



Don't go there little dog...


Yes, you know it's winter time when Jinx is an almost permanent fixture on my blankets.

That's all for now.

I got a call this morning from a local doctor's office and the BO manager wants me to come in Monday morning for another interview!!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

This is the one I'm really, really, really wanting...so we'll see! 

Thanks to everyone for all the wonderful thoughts!

**huggles & smoochies flist**

I hope everyone who was in the path of these bitches is alright!!!
And I know those in Wisconsin must be in shock...but rest assured, tornadoes in winter are almost a regular occurence down here...you just got caught up in this freaky shit. So when people up north talk about their tornado season...I just shrug, ours is all year. Shoot, back in '01, a lady close to where my sister lives died in a tornado the day after Thanksgiving.

Again, I truly hope everyone is well.

**huggles**

As of 1/3/08, I am unemployed. Fired, canned, laid off...no matter how you put it...I'm out of a fuckin job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So what my work is BEYOND excellent..so what I've pulled the BO out of the toilet DOZENS  of times....YOU'RE TERMINATED!!!!

Now if they'd only meant that in the 'literal' sense then I wouldn't be looking for a cliff to jump off of...fuckers!


EDIT:

Now that I've calmed...somewhat...I'll try to explain a little better than just rant.

I work in the business office of a hospital, but I am 'contract labor'; meaning my boss is in Florida and I do the same work the business office does, just on older accounts.

Anyhoo, I not only did I do my job, but I ended up doing whatever else the BO needed done because their own people can't get it done. I used to work directly for the hospital in the BO but it's pretty sad because I was only making 7.50/hour and MDS paid me twice that FOR THE SAME EXACT WORK!!! So it was a no-brainer when the position with MDS came open. That was back in February of '04. I've NEVER had a complaint about my work, other than I was screwing the curve for the other 'on-site reps' at other facilities. Oh well, MY bosses weren't bitching, they were thrilled so I wasn't bothered by co-workers bitching.

Late summer of this year, the hospital is sold, #2 since I've been there. No biggie, no changes except lots of blocking on the internet and my boss let me know that the IT assholes at the hospital I worked at were watching me because I was one of the 'top 5' for internet usage. NO SHIT! 90% of the insurances have websites I would check eligibility and claim statuses on...then yes, once that was done I'd check my email and lj, etc. ALL MY WORK IS CAUGHT UP AND THEN SOME!!!!!!!! ALWAYS HAS BEEN!!!

Then!!! THEN!!!! Somewhere the end of November or December, the hospital is SOLD AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!
That's all we know. Wednesday, work was ok, no hint of the coming shit hitting the fan. Thursday, my phone at my desk won't work, facility email won't work...so I just think they have an internal problem. No. Half an hour later, my boss called and said, as gently as possible, that due to the new owners they would not be signing MDS to a contract. We had to leave the facility NOW!!! I couldn't even take my personal stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to come back TODAY and have them ESCORT me to my office and WATCHED ME AS I PACKED MY SHIT!!!! That was the freakin worst, being treated like I was some sort of criminal.

One of them, the little twerp IT bitch who I SWEAR will get hers, popped off with; "You used the computer too much for personal use anway." 
I glared at her like WTF?!?!?!!?!
She said, "We've seen the Word docs you're reading on your scuzzy drive."
That broke the camel's back!
One, you freakin retard! It is NOT a scuzzy drive, you ignorant shit! It's a flash or usb drive. TWO! I was not READING as you think, I was writing while on my 1/2 hour hold, 5 times a daily call to freakin' FirstSource for claim status. What else am I gonna do while waiting, pick my nose????
THREE!!!!! I was doing that on MDS' computer, local... NOT ON YOUR PIECE OF SHIT NETWORK YOU'RE SO ALL FIRED JAZZED UP TO PROTECT!!!
You can take this sad ass excuse for a place of employment and stick it!

She just stared at me like, OMG! I just can't believe someone talked to me that way!
AND BTW...Just what the hell were they doing watching MY local drive like that???? I think secretly the pervs were piggbacking on my IP address...fuckers!!! If I'd known they were watching so intently, I sure as hell would've given them something to really make their eyeballs bleed. *grins*

Anyway, my boss in Florida and the BO supervisor at the hospital already said they'd give me a 'glowing' reference. I've already filled out an application with a hospital in another city and with a local physician's office. Hey, no one's going to hire me just to write smut, so I might as well stick with what I've been doing best. Harrassing the shit out of insurance companies!

Thanks so much for all the concern and hugs and glomps and what not! I'm not feeling like jumping off a cliff or sitting on the train tracks so much any more, but it's still a damned good thing we can't lie down and give it up like elves.

I'll keep everyone in touch.

*tackles and snogs my flist*

I know, I know. No one hears from me in like FOREVER and I pop up just to gripe and bitch. But they say stick with what you know best, so......

Firstly! I DO have pressies and cards...I just refuse to send them out with the rest of the herd. I am sick to death of people, et al co-workers, relatives, scumbags..they know who they are, being such ASSHOLES the entire year then think they can make it up to you at Christmas time. I enjoy the season, but this hypocrisy is just too damned much!!! Example, I'm at the store looking for cards. There's a little old lady looking at the 'regular saccharine' cards. My cell rings, it's Tabby. Here's the conversation:

"What 'cha doin', sissy?"

"Not much, just looking for some damned Christmas cards that aren't so fake and full of bullshit they make me gag. I haven't butt-kissed or anything like that all year, why start now?"

Tabby giggles like mad, little old lady flees the insane one. *grins*

So flist, do not fear, you're pressies shall be on their way. Just look at it as an extended "Yule Season".

Secondly, I've realized working on my darkfics has caused a 'relapse' of sorts. It seems it's opened a can of worms and my 'Gollum' voice has had free rein. Bitch! Between re-reading my previous fics and realizing "DAMMIT! Those aren't so bad!!! I don't care how many people read or don't read them. I LIKE THEM!!!!!" and becoming addicted to DDR (it's got me off my ass and shaking my booty and feeling REALLY good!!!!!!!) I've got the little bastard back in its corner and have resumed my writing. Yay me!!!!!!

Lastly...all the puppies have good homes, or so I thought! Don't worry, Dark, Carmel went to a lovely lady with a little girl who is spoiling the shit out of him. I work with her and get daily updates. I really wish you could've had him, but life just sucks shit that way.
Last Thursday, the lady who picked the runt of the bunch, little Saddle (for the dark stripe over her shoulders), she brought her back. Said all she did was sleep, cry, and run in circles??? I knew she may have some issues and warned the lady of them repeatedly. Australian Shepherds are suspectible to deafness, ESPECIALLY if they have alot of white, and Saddle DOES! Also, I was concerned with her eyesight as her eyes didn't open until a good week after her brothers and sister did. But run in circles and cry all the time???
They said they took her to a vet in Dardanelle (I don't trust ANY of those quacks) and he said she was completely deaf and blind and obviously had neurological problems if she ran in circles. He offered to 'put her down for you and dispose of the carcass'.
WTF?!?!?!?! Thank GOD the lady remembered that I offered to take her back if there was any problems. So she came back home, no hard feelings. She runs around the house and yard like there's no problem!! She plays and plays and plays!!! Yes, she's deaf but she does see, not as well as she should but she can see. Our theory is she had no one to play with and she just moped.





All I see is a happy puppy and that's all that matters. So Saddle is home to stay.

Hope to become more regular on here! Now off to grumble at these festive hypocrites some more!

**huggles**

SQUEEE!!!!! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!! Whoever sent me the LJ gift certificate...I shall grovel at your feet!! SQUEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Now hopefully to make you guys squee!

4 week old puppies!!!






Hershey and Carmel; Dark named her puppy Carmel and Carmel he shall be!


Carmel....please let me out!


Quick!! Make a run for it!!

Sorry I've been absent. Not being able to log in at work really sucks and when I get home I'm so busy...but enough of that shit.

I was stunned when Patricia passed, but was so very happy that she was no longer hurting. It doesn't matter even if you know it's going to happen, it still takes the wind out of your sails when they go. I'll NEVER forget her and will always feel such affection at the way she encouraged me and so many others.

My sister's trial has to start over. The jury awarded her 5 million but the asshole defendants appealed. She didn't even know the jury awarded her ANYTHING!! She just knew they may have to start over. She didn't know why until someone called her up saying they read the trial update in the paper and saw she won 5 mil. WTF?!?!? She said. I don't have any money! WTF are you doing even asking me for any??? I sooooooooo am pissed with them. These bastards KNOW they were negligent!!! They KNOW they made shitty equipment!!!!! Now she is so depressed and angry and frustrated I'm terrorified she's going to do something stupid. It took YEARS to get this far now they want to start over?!?!?!?!?

Sorry for the venting...puppy pic spammage coming up shortly!


EDIT: Sorry, for those who don't know, the sister I'm talking about is the one outside of Buffalo NY. She was injured on some home exercise equipment around 1996 and has had 13 back surgeries because of the damage done. She can't stand for very long, sit for very long, she CANNOT have kids, the meds she's on for pain have screwed with her so much it's not even funny. She has these moments where she 'zones' out for just a bit. Creepy, I know. She was hoping this would be over so she could move back south as the cold up there just KILLS her back.

FUCK YOU CORPORATE ASSHOLES!!!!!!!!
Sorry!